The Best Wedding Table Is The Ragtag Bunch Of Randoms Who Were Lucky To Score An Invite

“You had 2 friends from primary school, 2 randoms the groom worked with at JB Hifi and the bride’s hairdresser. Oh and that guy who I’m pretty sure is the groom’s pot dealer.

Weddings are a joyous occasion, whether you’re at the bridal table or any other seat in the venue. But a recent study by Monash University has confirmed that when it comes to weddings, not all tables are created equal.

At your standard wedding, each table usually has a theme. You often have a table of work colleagues. A table or two of cousins, uncles, aunties etc. The bridal table. And a few tables of friends that are connected in some way. But the best weddings have one extra table- the weird loose table of randoms who were lucky to score an invite at all. That is where you want to be.

We caught up with Scott Peterson (23), an aspiring hand model and street performer at the wedding of a guy he used to play poker with.

“Can’t believe I scored an invite to this shindig. I haven’t seen the groom for like 6 years. But I’m stoked. All the single girls are on this table, and everyone is getting really loose. Pretty sure the bags are coming out in a few minutes.”

While the study was very clear as to which table is the most fun, the jury is still out as to why. Some believe it is due to the fact that every person is grateful to even be there. Others believe that it is due to the young average age of the individuals typically seated at the randoms table. Scott has his own theory.

“No one at this table really knows anyone else at the wedding. No matter what they do or say at this wedding, there’s no repercussions. No one to give them shit about the person they hook up with, no older members of their family to judge them. Oh and because they don’t know anyone else, no one does that rude thing where they go and sit at another table. It’s just a ragtag bunch of loose individuals.”

The study also confirmed that the opportunity doesn’t come along too often. On average, people are seated at such a table once or twice in their lifetime if they’re lucky. And some never have the chance to experience it. Scott is savouring every moment.